


and i'll be holding onto you

by quiescentry



Category: South Park
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-21
Updated: 2017-12-21
Packaged: 2019-02-18 00:23:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 786
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13088550
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/quiescentry/pseuds/quiescentry
Summary: in the haziness of fourth grade gripped by the terror of growing up, kyle finds a lifeline to hold on to.





	and i'll be holding onto you

kyle holds on to kenny's left hand.

kenny's eyes grow wide in surprise, but kyle is avoiding his gaze so kenny doesn't ask. instead, he gives kyle's right hand a quick squeeze. a response, like he understands.  
  
but kyle knows he doesn't; kenny's too kind to know that kyle hopes he could somehow siphon kenny's immortality through the warmth of his brown mittened hands, because maybe if he held on long enough he'd be able to grasp a little bit of eternity and time would really stop for the both of them and they could stay like this forever in the chaotic peace that was south park's Fourth Grade.  
  
it was stupid, he knew that. you can't possibly think some cheesy-ass peter pan storyline would happen and south park would magically transform into a neverland of fucked up bullshit that occured every other day - just because you hold someone's hand.  
  
but he could dream, a little. south park, with its biting winds and nevermelting snow already seemed like it'd be perfectly situated in the crack of space-time. from the irresponsible adults and rampant happenings running across town every other weekend; to being the temporary home to jesus and satan living in (relative) peace with them, would it be so much of a stretch to think that growing up would be impossible, too?  
  
kyle sucked in a breath and the heave of his chest made something in his head click, and all too suddenly the cynicism stan held in his four foot and ten inched body when he hit the age of ten made sense, and the waves of revelation came crashing down on kyle, his knees buckling under the weight of his introspection.  
  
"kyle? kyle, woah!" kenny yelps, his hand darting forward to catch kyle.  
  
"uhh." was all kyle could think of to say. his voice was catching in his throat and puberty was going to shatter it.

"are you okay?" kenny asks, worry seeping into his too blue eyes.  
  
kyle nods. speaking would ruin everything so he holds his words in.  
  
kenny blinks and his brow furrows. "hmm," he pouts, and in a way that is just like kenny as it is unlikely to be, he stands in front of kyle and fusses over him by staring into his eyes. piercing. "you're sure?"  
  
this time, kyle is sure: not that he is okay but that time has frozen around them both.  
  
the falling snow halted in its descent, hanging in midair like tiny flakes of golden-white glitter; the setting sun stops setting and sets off a muted orange glow behind kenny; the edges of him are frayed in its light and kyle stops breathing.  
  
he leans in close, not daring to move anywhere else, and places his lips on soft, chapped eternity.  
  
his eyes flutter close by themselves and neither make a move or a sound.  
  
the closeness was comforting, kenny never let go of his hand. kyle could smell the unwashed parka and it stings of mud and pool water but somehow it only made it feel more real; eternity was touchable and it was standing right in front of him. with matted blonde hair that stuck to his forehead, lashes that won't quit and _kenny never let go of his hand._  
  
time creaks back into motion when kyle parts; he breathes easily like he never stopped and he feels warm, at ease. snow falls all around kenny and the golden halo the sun created that sat atop his head is gone, the aftermath of a first kiss blooming red on his cheeks.  
  
"what the hell was that!" kenny exclaims, but he doesn't sound angry in the slightest.  
  
kyle smiles easily. "i'm just trying to see if i could steal a bit of it. y'know. your "immortality" or whatever." his voice is thick with fondness and affection; kyle decides he likes that about himself now.  
  
"oh." kenny says, a grin spreading slow on his face. kyle likes that too. "you just put your face on mine. that's not how kissing works, so that's not going to happen. but thanks for trying anyway."  
  
"like you'd know about how real kissing works - wait, so it'll work if i kiss you properly?"  
  
"no idea. you wanna test that theory out?" kenny says, his eyes shining, and in them kyle could see that eternity was gentle, eternity was kind. the unspoken fear that lay locked in his heart dissipated into the cold air. if he could have such a gentle immortal standing right next to him maybe growing up would be that much more bearable.  
  
fingers still linked, their laughter bubbled and wisped away with their breaths, warmth mingling in the air.  
  
kyle held onto kenny's left hand.

**Author's Note:**

> i hope everything is kind of coherent.  
> feel free to give me some feedback either way. i appreciate it, and i'll write more.


End file.
